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Humor

Remembering George H.W. Bush – My hike with President Bush

Remembering George H.W. Bush – My hike with President Bush

When I received a phone invitation to go on a hike through the Giant Sequoias in California with President George H.W. Bush during the summer of 1992, my initial reaction was, “Right, who is this, really?” I could name any number of wonderful friends who would make such an “official” offer while doubled up with mirth and glee – eager to hang any appearance of gullibility over my head for a lifetime.

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Lost in Translation: Funny Chinese English on warning signs

Lost in Translation: Funny Chinese English on warning signs

The eleven signs with funny Chinese English in this post are part of our second offering in a series of stories on funny Chinese-to-English translation fails. If you missed it, be sure to check out “Lost in Translation: Fire warnings become funny Chinese signs.” Now, without further ado, funny Chinese signs with extremely humorous translation fails focused on warning the public about something or other.

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Lost in Translation: Fire warnings become funny Chinese English signs

Lost in Translation: Fire warnings become funny Chinese English signs

Funny Chinese English translation fails are legendary and the stuff that inspires countless online spoofs, digital highlights, published humor books and even plays. You don’t have to spend more than a few hours in China before funny Chinese English signs and translations begin to leap out at you inspiring raised eyebrows, giggles and even outbursts of laughter. Enjoy this one with funny Chinese English signs for fire warnings.

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British insults: Yeah, I deserved it

British insults: Yeah, I deserved it

British insults. To be able to deliver the classy and thoughtful zinger of an insult is of course a time-honored British tradition. My moment of being on the receiving end of an artful insult happened on a misty mountaintop in the Lake District of England.

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Running at Disney World turned me into an outlaw

Running at Disney World turned me into an outlaw

During a trip to Orlando, Fla., in 2015, I was reminded of a previous vacation my husband and I took to Orlando’s Disney World – one where I actually tried running at Disney World. For runners, the city can be so aggravating: I call it the home of “sidewalks to nowhere.” That’s assuming there are any. Usually there are not. The moniker “sidewalks to nowhere” came up a long time ago when I would find that sidewalks just ended – wheelchair ramp and all – leaving any unlucky pedestrian in the middle of a busy street or slogging through rough grass and mud beside an endless stream of cars and trucks. Basically, this city ain’t designed for anything but automobiles.

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Keep robots outta my trousers – say no to nanopants

Keep robots outta my trousers – say no to nanopants

It seems everyone is gaga over the stain-resistant properties of clothing using nanotechnology — tiny robots to perform the manipulating and positioning of individual atoms thereby eliminating stains. And I know what you are thinking … that’s way cool. But think on this. What if those robots go rogue, in your pants?

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Airfare add ons are reaching the absurd

Airfare add ons are reaching the absurd

Flying on too many airlines in the world these days requires a calculator to determine all the airfare add ons unless you are privileged enough to have more than an average level of frequent flier status. Airfare add ons for luggage. More add ons for carry ons and luggage. Adding it all up can drive you crazy. Thanks to one of our intrepid world travelers for providing us so much fodder to create this decidedly, but not so far off, tongue-in-cheek ticket add-on detail…

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I love a good shea butter massage … is that wrong?

I love a good shea butter massage … is that wrong?

I can honestly say I like a spa that offers shea butter massage and exfoliation. But it wasn’t always this way. My sojourn to the dark side began with an argument. A late summer’s day evening found me engaged in nonsensical combat with my lovely dark-haired wife, Therese. We were wielding verbal daggers with abandon, spilling emotional blood all over the floor; evidence of a marriage stressed by too much time spent growing a business and not enough time nurturing the soul.

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Harvard killed any ‘sex is exercise’ pitch dammit

Harvard killed any ‘sex is exercise’ pitch dammit

Thanks a lot, Harvard! In almost less time than it takes to click into a website, the Harvard Men’s Health Watch cut the legs out from under my most persuasive pitch for having sex – “Honey, sex is exercise and good for me.” Since my wife loves me and does care about what’s good for me, that line is a proven winner.

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